3 THINGS THAT HOLD WOMEN BACK IN THEIR LEADERSHIP

1. THE CONFIDENCE GAP

That's 30% more than men.

This matters for (at least) 3 reasons.
1) We need a high level of confidence to create the behaviours that make us influential
2) Women in particular need to feel confident before we apply for new roles
3) Research says that confidence is at least as important as ability in securing opportunities.

The good news is that, as any elite athlete will testify, we can increase confidence with coaching and training. If there's something holding you back - it doesn't have to be a big deal to address it.

What we often don't realise is that confidence comes AFTER we do something, not before. So if you're waiting to feel more confident before doing something, you could be waiting a long time!

What we need beforehand is courage. And that's about managing our fears and creating a self-identity that will propel us forward. These reduce the height of the barriers and enable us to progress more easily, with less anxiety.

2. THE NEED TO BE LIKED

It may be difficult to hear but, for women, there's a negative correlation between being liked and being a leader. We all know that when men's behaviour is called assertive, women's behaviour is referred to as 'bossy'.

Women are also brought up to please others. This is why being liked is so important to us.

Put these two things together and you get a situation where women leaders can be tempted to want to be liked more than to be respected. We want our teams to like us.

Sometimes being a leader means you make unpopular decisions. 'Nice' leaders avoid the necessary difficult conversations, have trouble holding others to account and can fudge the challenging issues.

Kindness and compassion are essential, but Leadership is about respect, not liking.

3. FOCUSSING INWARDS AT THE EXPENSE OF INFLUENCING OUTWARDS

Women tend to believe that if they work diligently and do a good job, that will be enough to get them noticed and promoted.

Unfortunately, while men tend to spend time networking, and associating with their seniors, research shows that women prefer to associate with those more junior to them.

So when it comes to being tapped on the shoulder for a new role, the men are more top of mind - and they start the interview process as someone who is already known to the interviewers and has already expressed an interest in promotion and a talent for the job.

Even if there is no unconscious bias towards men in these situations, women put themselves at a disadvantage by facing inwards towards their teams at the expense of collaborating and influencing outwards. As a result, the men are more 'mentally available' to the hirer: